1 00:00:08,216 --> 00:00:11,761 - Is green tea all right for you, Hillary? - Mmm-hmm. Thank you. 2 00:00:11,844 --> 00:00:14,096 Mmm, so, when I finally got to New York, 3 00:00:14,180 --> 00:00:18,601 and I knew that I wanted to support myself on my own, so I could write, 4 00:00:18,643 --> 00:00:21,354 um, well, I thought that was gonna mean, you know, 5 00:00:21,437 --> 00:00:25,399 serving cheesecake in Junior's, or temping in the Bronx. 6 00:00:25,441 --> 00:00:26,692 And it turned out, 7 00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:32,281 it meant part-time sex work in an oddly clinical townhouse in Midtown. 8 00:00:32,323 --> 00:00:34,784 And, uh... you know something? 9 00:00:36,327 --> 00:00:38,496 That was the happiest I've ever been. 10 00:00:38,704 --> 00:00:41,666 But I don't understand 'cause you came to New York 'cause you wanted to write, 11 00:00:41,749 --> 00:00:44,627 so, I don't really get, like, how, like, servicing other people 12 00:00:44,710 --> 00:00:46,128 would give you what you wanted. 13 00:00:46,170 --> 00:00:49,549 Yes, but that's the mistake we all make, isn't it? 14 00:00:49,632 --> 00:00:52,510 Believing that being a writer means being, you know, 15 00:00:52,593 --> 00:00:55,221 totally and utterly uninterrupted. 16 00:00:55,304 --> 00:00:58,766 It means silence. It means, you know, a room of one's own. 17 00:00:58,808 --> 00:01:01,561 No, no, no. See, that's bullshit. 18 00:01:01,644 --> 00:01:05,898 Bullshit. That's what we perceive a male writer to have, you know? 19 00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:10,069 And that can lead to, ugh, horrible solipsism, 20 00:01:10,695 --> 00:01:12,280 and disconnection from humanity. 21 00:01:12,321 --> 00:01:15,575 I'm not naming names. Never naming names. 22 00:01:15,658 --> 00:01:17,076 Martin-fucking-Amis, 23 00:01:17,201 --> 00:01:19,495 Woody Allen, Saul Bellow. 24 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:22,582 If you give the men the space that they say they need, 25 00:01:22,665 --> 00:01:24,542 then their work suffers, they suffer. 26 00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:26,210 I guess that surprises me 27 00:01:26,294 --> 00:01:28,379 'cause I've always thought that I was working towards this moment 28 00:01:28,462 --> 00:01:29,880 when everything else would fall away, 29 00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:33,259 and I would just be, like, you know, alone, and able to just indulge my thoughts. 30 00:01:33,342 --> 00:01:36,554 No, but that's bullshit. I mean, can you even picture that? 31 00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:38,514 Can you picture that? 32 00:01:39,015 --> 00:01:42,768 I am not a mother, and there's a reason for that. 33 00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:47,773 Because childlessness is the natural state of the female author, okay? 34 00:01:47,857 --> 00:01:50,776 Write that down, get used to it, you know? 35 00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:52,153 And, you know, I hate it when everyone says, 36 00:01:52,194 --> 00:01:53,654 "Yeah, having a baby makes you part of the world." 37 00:01:53,696 --> 00:01:55,156 I really resent that. 38 00:01:55,197 --> 00:01:58,034 I don't need one of those to be able to look around. 39 00:01:58,117 --> 00:01:59,410 You know? I don't... 40 00:01:59,493 --> 00:02:02,496 It's like having a truck driven through your vagina, isn't it? 41 00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:04,915 Totally. So, then I'll just put it out there... 42 00:02:04,999 --> 00:02:09,211 Is being a writer and being a woman, um, at the same time, 43 00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,005 is it as hard as it seems or... 44 00:02:11,964 --> 00:02:13,466 Harder. 45 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:31,359 I'm not scared. 46 00:02:33,527 --> 00:02:37,406 As long as I can keep my mother alive, I'm not scared. 47 00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:41,202 You mean tell me, mission does not scare you? 48 00:02:52,838 --> 00:02:56,842 What scares me is losing the woman who raised me. 49 00:02:56,926 --> 00:02:59,595 What scares me is the cancer 50 00:02:59,637 --> 00:03:04,517 taking over her whole body, and finally her head, 51 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:07,228 robbing her of oxygen and of the will to live. 52 00:03:09,021 --> 00:03:10,731 What scares me is this world. 53 00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:16,195 - No, I'm not scared. - Cut! 54 00:03:16,278 --> 00:03:18,572 - Jesus fucking... - Cut, please, now! 55 00:03:20,658 --> 00:03:21,951 Take break, Jadviga. 56 00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:26,914 - What? - Still, I feel there's no emotions from you. 57 00:03:26,956 --> 00:03:30,334 This feeling of big nothing, which, for me, is not okay. 58 00:03:30,418 --> 00:03:33,045 I still don't understand why he's talking so much right now. 59 00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:34,964 He is fucking scared. 60 00:03:35,005 --> 00:03:38,134 And he's been so private about his mother's illness up until now. 61 00:03:38,175 --> 00:03:39,760 So, what is it about now that makes him 62 00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:41,637 all of a sudden wanna go on and on and on... 63 00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:44,515 - These are lines to explain! - Yes, I know. I know. 64 00:03:44,598 --> 00:03:47,101 I just think I could do a better job if I don't say the lines. 65 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:50,438 - So, which lines would you say, hmm? - No lines. 66 00:03:50,646 --> 00:03:54,650 "- No lines"? With no lines, no story! - Just... 67 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:58,487 I want lines sometimes, Director Olatta. 68 00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:00,948 Other times, I don't. It just depends. 69 00:04:01,073 --> 00:04:04,618 Adam, you're very talented, but I cannot keep with the debating you! 70 00:04:04,660 --> 00:04:08,122 - It gets me so frustrate! - I'm also very "frustrate," okay? 71 00:04:08,247 --> 00:04:10,833 I think we both want the same thing. 72 00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:12,710 We wanna make the best movie we possibly can 73 00:04:12,793 --> 00:04:14,086 in the shortest amount of time. 74 00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:16,797 I'm saying we're limited, unfortunately. 75 00:04:16,839 --> 00:04:18,424 Yesterday, I'm completely here and... 76 00:04:18,507 --> 00:04:20,926 This is so fucking rude to talk about someone and... 77 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,344 Fuck this! 78 00:04:23,679 --> 00:04:25,556 Uh, goodbye. It was nice meeting you, but... 79 00:04:25,639 --> 00:04:27,641 - What? - Best of luck with your son's graduation. 80 00:04:27,683 --> 00:04:29,643 I'm fucking leaving! 81 00:04:30,019 --> 00:04:32,271 What? What? What? 82 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:34,690 This thing is itchy as fuck! 83 00:04:35,232 --> 00:04:37,818 Oh, you're so hot. Oh. 84 00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:39,737 - I wanna come. - Fuck me. Yes, please come. 85 00:04:39,820 --> 00:04:42,406 And then I'll come with your come in my body. 86 00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:44,033 Okay, great. 87 00:04:44,116 --> 00:04:45,701 - You want a countdown, or... - Yeah. 88 00:04:45,743 --> 00:04:48,704 Five, four, three, two... 89 00:04:48,788 --> 00:04:52,208 You came early. Hold on. Almost there. 90 00:05:01,550 --> 00:05:05,888 I wanna die inside the mouth of a lion with you. 91 00:05:05,971 --> 00:05:10,810 And that way, we can be together forever even in the moment of our own death. 92 00:05:11,227 --> 00:05:14,688 Your death and my death... Right? 93 00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:19,026 - Hello? - Huh? Yeah. 94 00:05:22,154 --> 00:05:23,197 What? 95 00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:25,074 I would literally die for someone to say that to me. 96 00:05:25,157 --> 00:05:26,784 That's, like, fucking poetry. 97 00:05:26,867 --> 00:05:28,661 It's, like, Shakespeare. 98 00:05:28,911 --> 00:05:31,580 Yeah, no, it is poetry. It's beautiful and flattering. 99 00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:33,958 - Good. - Yeah. 100 00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:39,255 But couldn't we just, like... Um, just get dinner sometimes? 101 00:05:39,338 --> 00:05:41,131 - Yeah. - I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks. 102 00:05:41,215 --> 00:05:44,677 You're always at rehearsal, or booty body camp, whatever it is. 103 00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:48,681 Ray, it's not my fault if I wanna get strong for myself. 104 00:05:48,764 --> 00:05:49,890 Yeah, no, I know. 105 00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:54,562 And that's great. That's good. And you are strong. It's just... 106 00:05:54,603 --> 00:05:56,689 I don't know. Look, I wanna be in the lion's mouth with you. 107 00:05:56,772 --> 00:05:58,107 - It sounds nice. - Good. 108 00:05:58,148 --> 00:06:00,901 It sounds cozy and warm and exciting and dangerous. 109 00:06:00,943 --> 00:06:02,278 But I also... 110 00:06:02,361 --> 00:06:04,113 I don't know, don't you just wanna, like, get dumplings, 111 00:06:04,196 --> 00:06:05,781 and throw down a few beers and just catch up? 112 00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:07,533 See what you've been up to and stuff? 113 00:06:07,616 --> 00:06:09,410 Yeah, obviously, that would be great. 114 00:06:09,451 --> 00:06:12,746 That's, like, if you asked me, like, "What's your ideal plan?" 115 00:06:12,788 --> 00:06:16,292 - That's my ideal plan. - Well, let's do it. Let's do it tonight. 116 00:06:16,417 --> 00:06:19,336 Oh, no, I can't tonight. I have a thing. And don't ask. 117 00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:21,881 It's far too long and boring a story to explain what it is. 118 00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:24,717 But... Actually, that reminds me, 119 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,177 it's gonna be a total nightmare getting uptown. 120 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:31,765 Do you think if I Uber, it will be made worth it 121 00:06:31,807 --> 00:06:34,727 if I'm able to meditate and catch up on emails in the car? 122 00:06:34,810 --> 00:06:37,980 Or should I try to meditate on the train? 123 00:06:38,022 --> 00:06:39,982 I mean, last time I tried to meditate on the train, 124 00:06:40,065 --> 00:06:42,401 some dude was manspreading next to me. 125 00:06:42,484 --> 00:06:43,986 It's just, it's harder, 126 00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:46,530 but maybe that's a better challenge to my ability to remain mindful. 127 00:06:46,614 --> 00:06:48,616 - It's just such a much steadier... - Huh? 128 00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:54,204 - Should I Uber? - What? 129 00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:57,291 Uber? Yeah. You can take an Uber. 130 00:06:58,500 --> 00:07:00,920 Hot rod in my urethra 131 00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:05,299 Pipe cleaner. It feels like a pipe cleaner's in there. 132 00:07:07,092 --> 00:07:08,844 Ow! 133 00:07:09,053 --> 00:07:12,431 Law & Order: UTI. 134 00:07:12,514 --> 00:07:17,603 It's not funny. It feels so bad, okay? And I didn't even get this one from sex. 135 00:07:17,686 --> 00:07:19,521 I just walked around in wet underwear for a couple of days. 136 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,273 You're gross. 137 00:07:21,690 --> 00:07:24,193 Hannah, can you text that one interesting lesbian you know, 138 00:07:24,234 --> 00:07:26,570 and see if she can get me into the New York Mag party, tonight? 139 00:07:26,654 --> 00:07:28,864 I don't know, Elijah. My bladder's on fire. 140 00:07:28,906 --> 00:07:31,867 I don't know if I feel like abusing my media contacts for you right now. 141 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:34,703 Jaden Pinkett Smith is starting a greeting-card line. 142 00:07:34,787 --> 00:07:37,831 Please! You're gonna look cool for even knowing about it. 143 00:07:38,332 --> 00:07:39,875 Can I at least have some painkillers? 144 00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:45,464 Oh, I wish you had asked me, like, two hours ago. Clean out. 145 00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:48,968 - Will you tickle my back? - No. 146 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:54,056 You know how they're shutting the NR down at DeKalb? 147 00:07:54,098 --> 00:07:55,933 Reminds me of this time 148 00:07:56,016 --> 00:07:58,894 back when I was assistant to the transportation commissioner, 149 00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:02,731 when, and they don't tell you this, they shut the B down, 150 00:08:02,773 --> 00:08:05,776 or let's just say they pretended to shut the B down, 151 00:08:05,859 --> 00:08:10,030 leaving it running only for the mayor and his homosexual friends. 152 00:08:10,906 --> 00:08:12,866 - Sorry. - I think you can imagine 153 00:08:12,908 --> 00:08:16,495 who I might be talking about. But if you can't, picture this. 154 00:08:16,745 --> 00:08:20,416 A train full of homosexuals. Me? I don't judge. 155 00:08:20,457 --> 00:08:21,917 Riding in secret. 156 00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:23,669 Wow. That's a crazy story. 157 00:08:23,752 --> 00:08:25,921 - Here you go. - Oh, you can't imagine what I saw. 158 00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:30,009 - But my job was just to be quiet... - Sure, yeah, just to be quiet. 159 00:08:30,134 --> 00:08:32,052 Here you go. It was really nice seeing you, Bobby. 160 00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:33,762 Thanks for coming in. I'll see you tomorrow, okay? 161 00:08:33,804 --> 00:08:35,264 - Have a good one. - Yeah. 162 00:08:37,766 --> 00:08:40,769 Uh, hey, is that scone raisin, or craisin? 163 00:08:41,311 --> 00:08:43,731 I don't know, man. I don't know. 164 00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:48,861 - Hey, Bobby? - Jesus. 165 00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:53,157 Bobby. 166 00:08:53,532 --> 00:08:54,908 Guys, someone call 911! 167 00:08:54,950 --> 00:08:58,037 Bobby? Bobby? 168 00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:04,460 And, Desi, it is my personal opinion that we really need to get back to work. 169 00:09:04,501 --> 00:09:06,462 More specifically, you need to get back to work. 170 00:09:06,545 --> 00:09:08,422 And I think it would be good for your health. 171 00:09:08,464 --> 00:09:09,965 Oh, for my health? Okay. 172 00:09:10,007 --> 00:09:11,800 So, I should just bail on my recovery? 173 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:13,510 - Do you think that's a good idea? - No. 174 00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:15,929 Hey, nice doing business with you. It's been great. 175 00:09:15,971 --> 00:09:18,974 I mean, I don't wanna play the blame game, but you're my worst enabler. 176 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,976 What you just did right there, and I don't wanna insult you, 177 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,811 but that was fucked up what you just did right there. 178 00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:24,313 - Okay. - All right. 179 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:26,732 It's not an insult. Nobody's blaming you. 180 00:09:26,815 --> 00:09:30,527 Desi just feels as if maybe you have helped to support, 181 00:09:30,611 --> 00:09:32,446 - even encourage his relapse. - Yeah. 182 00:09:32,488 --> 00:09:34,364 Again, I'm not quite sure how that isn't blaming me, 183 00:09:34,448 --> 00:09:36,825 but we can discuss... You and I can discuss that later. 184 00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:40,871 But I think that the idea, Desi, that I have, in some way, 185 00:09:40,954 --> 00:09:43,290 caused you to develop an addiction to something 186 00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:45,876 is absurd. 187 00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:49,171 - No, that's... No, it's not... - Oh, my God! 188 00:09:49,254 --> 00:09:50,839 - It's not absurd. - Am I... 189 00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,341 You're hearing what I'm hearing, right? 190 00:09:52,424 --> 00:09:53,842 - Because... - It's okay, it's okay. 191 00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,261 We're going to let Desi finish, and when he's done, 192 00:09:56,345 --> 00:09:58,055 you can then let us know how you feel. 193 00:09:58,138 --> 00:10:00,099 I promise you, I'll give you tons of time. 194 00:10:00,182 --> 00:10:02,351 Okay, you finish now, and then I'll have my time to talk. 195 00:10:02,392 --> 00:10:05,104 I've been thinking... I've been thinking... 196 00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:09,608 - Can I have some water? - Yeah, have some water. 197 00:10:20,536 --> 00:10:22,204 - Take your time. - Mmm. 198 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:33,549 Jesus. 199 00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,892 Good. Good. 200 00:10:45,811 --> 00:10:50,399 As I was saying... I've had a lot of time to think about this. 201 00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:55,320 And I take full responsibility for where I'm at. 202 00:10:55,779 --> 00:10:57,114 That said, 203 00:10:57,197 --> 00:10:59,575 Marne, you were there with me the whole time, right next to me. 204 00:10:59,658 --> 00:11:02,077 You were my partner, but you never saw me. 205 00:11:02,119 --> 00:11:05,080 - You just saw this dick... - Mmm. 206 00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:09,751 ...or this voice, you know, or this guitar, or this record contract. 207 00:11:09,793 --> 00:11:13,755 You had this idea about me, but you never actually saw me as a human. 208 00:11:13,797 --> 00:11:15,382 - Me, Desi. - Hmm. 209 00:11:17,092 --> 00:11:19,261 And I fucking loved you. 210 00:11:19,636 --> 00:11:22,222 I wasn't like your friends, like little Hannah and the gang, 211 00:11:22,264 --> 00:11:24,975 saying Marnie doesn't, you know, care about the environment, 212 00:11:25,058 --> 00:11:28,979 or Marnie's poetry is repetitive, or rolling their eyes and dismissing you, 213 00:11:29,062 --> 00:11:30,522 saying, "Oh, that's just so Marnie, you know?" 214 00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:34,276 I fucking loved... I loved when things were Marnie, you know? 215 00:11:34,359 --> 00:11:36,778 And I was all in. 216 00:11:38,447 --> 00:11:41,992 I just couldn't handle me. 217 00:11:42,451 --> 00:11:45,245 And you made that worse. 218 00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:49,583 You did, because when I was struggling, you know... 219 00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:51,084 You just shut down. 220 00:11:51,126 --> 00:11:53,587 I mean, you just fucking walked away. You gave up. 221 00:11:53,837 --> 00:11:55,631 I shut down? 222 00:11:55,672 --> 00:11:57,799 I gave up? 223 00:11:57,841 --> 00:12:00,636 Do you have any idea how hard this has been for me? 224 00:12:00,677 --> 00:12:02,471 I have bruises all over my body 225 00:12:02,554 --> 00:12:07,267 from the two-hour massages that I need to deal with the stress of your addiction. 226 00:12:10,354 --> 00:12:13,315 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 227 00:12:14,441 --> 00:12:15,943 - Did you hear what just happened? - Yeah. 228 00:12:15,984 --> 00:12:18,570 Because you just made my whole drug treatment about you. 229 00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:21,531 You did. You really did, Marnie. 230 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:26,453 And it's clear that your narcissism is detrimental to Desi's recovery. 231 00:12:26,620 --> 00:12:28,330 Can I just say one more thing? 232 00:12:28,455 --> 00:12:30,666 Clean up your side of the street, Marnie Marie. 233 00:12:30,707 --> 00:12:33,335 Keep your side of the street clean, Marnie Marie. 234 00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:35,629 Common traits exhibited by children 235 00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:38,048 who go on to be diagnosed as sociopaths 236 00:12:38,131 --> 00:12:40,634 include displaying a lack of empathy... 237 00:12:40,676 --> 00:12:41,760 Yep. 238 00:12:41,843 --> 00:12:43,178 - ...harming animals... - Guilty. 239 00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:44,972 - ...setting fires... - Yeah. 240 00:12:45,013 --> 00:12:46,890 - ...and petty vandalism. - Oh, my God, 241 00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:48,600 I did so much of this stuff. 242 00:12:50,185 --> 00:12:53,522 Adam, I think I may have been a child sociopath. 243 00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:58,277 I mean, I've completely outgrown it, but I'm a miracle. 244 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,529 I think I may have to write a term paper on me. 245 00:13:00,570 --> 00:13:05,075 I just quit the fucking movie. Fuck! The fuck did I do? 246 00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:08,412 I'm sure it's fine. Can't you just go back and apologize? 247 00:13:08,495 --> 00:13:10,914 These Eastern Europeans are used to all this coming and going. 248 00:13:10,998 --> 00:13:12,416 I can't fucking do this anymore. 249 00:13:12,499 --> 00:13:14,126 Wait around like some tool 250 00:13:14,209 --> 00:13:17,546 to be someone else's fucking tool! 251 00:13:17,587 --> 00:13:19,214 This shit's just so fucked! 252 00:13:19,548 --> 00:13:21,550 I'm just gonna tell my agent to take me out of the game 253 00:13:21,591 --> 00:13:24,553 because I'm so fucking pissed! 254 00:13:24,594 --> 00:13:27,431 Yeah, I know, darling. I know. 255 00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:30,225 Do you get to keep those jeans, though? 256 00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:32,144 Uh, I'm sorry? Uh, you don't know. 257 00:13:32,227 --> 00:13:36,398 You can do your job without a whole crew of assholes in your face. 258 00:13:36,481 --> 00:13:39,818 You just have one fucking psycho to analyze. 259 00:13:39,901 --> 00:13:41,653 - Like you? - Ha! 260 00:13:41,778 --> 00:13:46,241 Adam, this is why I'm saying you need to make your own movie. 261 00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:49,202 You are an artist! 262 00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:52,414 I'm someone who knows how to psychologically support an artist. 263 00:13:52,497 --> 00:13:53,915 You can't just make a movie, Jessa. 264 00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:58,962 You need funds and sandwiches, and people who care what you have... 265 00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:04,634 I mean, honestly, you're so boring. We can get that stuff. We'll sort that out. 266 00:14:04,718 --> 00:14:07,346 Money literally grows on trees. 267 00:14:07,804 --> 00:14:10,349 I mean, really, let's look this up. 268 00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:11,516 "Making 269 00:14:12,434 --> 00:14:13,643 "a 270 00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:17,105 "movie." 271 00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:18,857 There's a lot. 272 00:14:18,940 --> 00:14:21,777 God damn, that was stressful. 273 00:14:21,860 --> 00:14:23,528 Right in the middle of a busy workday like that, 274 00:14:23,612 --> 00:14:25,697 just... Thwack, down he goes. 275 00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:30,285 Yeah. Wow. José said his head smacked the ground really hard. 276 00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:32,412 I feel bad. 277 00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:35,624 He was trying to tell me this long, elaborate story about Ed Koch. 278 00:14:35,874 --> 00:14:37,793 Some secret gay train... But I was working, you know? 279 00:14:37,834 --> 00:14:42,464 You can't listen to everyone at the same time, or your fucking head will explode, you know? 280 00:14:42,547 --> 00:14:47,052 Maybe it's about picking who to listen to. 281 00:14:47,135 --> 00:14:48,929 What's that supposed to mean? 282 00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:53,809 How long were you on the community board? Three months? 283 00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:57,646 Then you quietly retreated back to dating girls with six-packs 284 00:14:58,188 --> 00:14:59,898 and pretending death wasn't real. 285 00:15:00,482 --> 00:15:02,776 I'm worried about you, Ray. You're smart. 286 00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:06,154 You've always been smart, but your priorities are 287 00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:07,531 cuckoo bananas. 288 00:15:07,614 --> 00:15:09,616 And, what, you're some fucking golden example? 289 00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:11,618 You hate your wife. You hate your job. 290 00:15:11,660 --> 00:15:13,745 The only thing that gives you a glimmer of joy on this planet 291 00:15:13,829 --> 00:15:15,247 is recycling soda cans. 292 00:15:15,330 --> 00:15:16,873 - It's free money! - You know what, Herm? 293 00:15:16,957 --> 00:15:18,667 You're starting to really fucking piss me off. 294 00:15:18,708 --> 00:15:20,794 You know that? I work hard for you. 295 00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,504 I work hard for this business, 296 00:15:22,587 --> 00:15:24,923 and you're gonna stand there and call me a waste of space, hmm? 297 00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,426 I don't need you to judge me 298 00:15:27,509 --> 00:15:30,720 for not letting Bobby gnash his dentures in my fucking face. 299 00:15:30,804 --> 00:15:32,472 And who made you God, by the way? 300 00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:35,058 I don't think I'm God, Ray. 301 00:15:35,142 --> 00:15:38,228 Good! Because there is no God. 302 00:15:38,311 --> 00:15:41,731 That's a very arrogant position, Ray. Congratulations. 303 00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:44,359 I've been with you through all these phases... 304 00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:47,863 The music, the failed sitcom script, 305 00:15:47,904 --> 00:15:50,699 the communism, community board, 306 00:15:50,740 --> 00:15:53,660 and now you're just coasting. 307 00:15:53,702 --> 00:15:55,203 And I'm probably responsible. 308 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,288 All right, you know what, Hermie? 309 00:15:56,371 --> 00:15:57,706 It's been a brutal fucking day. 310 00:15:57,747 --> 00:15:59,624 I'm not getting into this with you right now. 311 00:16:00,542 --> 00:16:04,296 So sensitive, so testy. Come on, Ray-Ray. 312 00:16:04,379 --> 00:16:09,384 I'm not calling you a waste of space. I'm calling you a waste of potential. 313 00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:12,846 I'm going home, wherever the fuck that is. 314 00:16:21,521 --> 00:16:23,607 - Hi, Mommy. - Hi. 315 00:16:23,940 --> 00:16:26,526 I got my Tracy on, and you're right, it's amazing. 316 00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,612 All these tiny muscles I didn't know I had. 317 00:16:28,695 --> 00:16:30,071 Yeah, it's a really great program. 318 00:16:30,155 --> 00:16:33,074 I'll get those tapes back from you just as soon as my knee's healed. 319 00:16:33,116 --> 00:16:34,910 Mom, I have blood in my pee again. 320 00:16:35,243 --> 00:16:36,912 Again? Let me see. 321 00:16:40,457 --> 00:16:41,791 Sorry. 322 00:16:41,917 --> 00:16:45,253 Ooh, okay, okay. You have to go to the ER. 323 00:16:45,378 --> 00:16:47,923 I don't wanna go to the ER, Mom. I'm on deadline. I can't. 324 00:16:47,964 --> 00:16:50,091 All right, Hannah, just go. 325 00:16:51,801 --> 00:16:53,428 Fine. 326 00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:58,058 No one's making movies about actual human people anymore. 327 00:16:58,099 --> 00:16:59,768 And that's where we come in. 328 00:16:59,809 --> 00:17:02,938 You know, it has to be raw and honest, real. 329 00:17:02,979 --> 00:17:05,148 Yeah, and the only shit that's real is shit that actually happened. 330 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:06,858 Yes. Yes! 331 00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:09,361 We have to mine our lives for the truth. 332 00:17:09,444 --> 00:17:11,488 You know, like, even if it fucking hurts, 333 00:17:11,571 --> 00:17:15,617 even if it's too painful for us to even comprehend. 334 00:17:15,659 --> 00:17:16,826 Yes. 335 00:17:18,870 --> 00:17:23,959 Adam, like us. Like us with Hannah. 336 00:17:24,459 --> 00:17:26,294 - No, no, no. - Yes. Yes! 337 00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:28,088 - We can't. - What do you mean "we can't"? 338 00:17:28,129 --> 00:17:30,549 It's perfect. It's perfect. 339 00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:32,425 It's about relationships, 340 00:17:32,467 --> 00:17:35,136 it's about loyalty and deceit, 341 00:17:35,178 --> 00:17:38,223 and it's raw, it's powerfully true, Adam. 342 00:17:38,306 --> 00:17:40,892 And it might even be cathartic for us. 343 00:17:40,976 --> 00:17:44,646 You know, help us to move on from this mess and be free. 344 00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:47,691 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yes! 345 00:17:48,191 --> 00:17:49,943 I'm, like, so sweaty right now. 346 00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:51,570 - This might be it. - Yes. 347 00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:54,364 It explains everything about human nature. 348 00:17:54,447 --> 00:17:57,492 How even with the best of intentions, we can't help but hurt each other. 349 00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:59,202 - Yes! - It's like a metaphor for war 350 00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:02,205 and corporations and religious strife, 351 00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:04,666 - all that shit! Yes! - Yes, yes! 352 00:18:05,333 --> 00:18:07,877 - Oh, Jesus! - Adam! 353 00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:11,423 Oh, my God. We might be a pair of goddamn geniuses. 354 00:18:14,217 --> 00:18:15,260 - Wait. - What? 355 00:18:15,343 --> 00:18:17,220 We have to shoot it on film. 356 00:18:17,304 --> 00:18:19,973 Yep. Okay. Like, fine. 357 00:18:21,725 --> 00:18:23,518 In black and white. 358 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:24,686 - Too much? - Yeah. 359 00:18:24,728 --> 00:18:25,854 Yeah, too much. 360 00:18:30,692 --> 00:18:32,068 I'm slipping. 361 00:18:40,327 --> 00:18:44,080 - Oh, fuck. - Oh, Shit. 362 00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:49,419 - I'm not sure if you remember me. - I remember you. 363 00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:55,091 - How you doing? - Uh, good. 364 00:18:55,175 --> 00:18:56,468 Good, yeah. 365 00:18:57,052 --> 00:19:02,349 Yeah, I mean, I'm in private practice now. Just pick up a few shifts a week here to help... 366 00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:04,726 The uninsured. It's very noble. 367 00:19:04,809 --> 00:19:06,728 But I do want you to know I tried to sign up for Obamacare 368 00:19:06,770 --> 00:19:10,649 - and the website fucked me over, so... - Well, I'll get right on that. 369 00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:12,567 Um, I have a UTI. 370 00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:16,905 I get them all the time, so I need, like, cipro, pyridium, 371 00:19:16,946 --> 00:19:19,282 codeine if you're feeling, you know, fun and fancy. 372 00:19:20,992 --> 00:19:23,870 Yes, your urine tested positive for infection. 373 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:26,289 In the future, 374 00:19:26,373 --> 00:19:29,042 I'd come see us a few days earlier, when the symptoms start. 375 00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:31,419 Yeah, it's just sometimes hard to tell if it's, like, 376 00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:34,964 just the baseline level of weirdness of my urethra, or an actual issue. 377 00:19:35,090 --> 00:19:37,926 So, it's like, what's being alive and what's an infection? 378 00:19:37,967 --> 00:19:39,594 These are my questions. 379 00:19:40,637 --> 00:19:45,767 I'm not sure if you pee after intercourse, but that can also help in preventing them. 380 00:19:46,101 --> 00:19:47,560 And, plus, you're pregnant. 381 00:19:52,607 --> 00:19:55,902 - Do you know that? - I do now. 382 00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,876 You know what, the hug kind of feels like the wrong thing, 383 00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:13,169 so, I'm gonna... 384 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,467 Do you know who the father is? 385 00:20:20,927 --> 00:20:26,433 Yeah, he's a water-ski instructor who I'm not likely to see again, so... 386 00:20:26,474 --> 00:20:27,934 He's thrilled. 387 00:20:30,812 --> 00:20:32,105 Listen, um... 388 00:20:34,357 --> 00:20:35,984 The abortion is an out-of-pocket expense, 389 00:20:36,067 --> 00:20:37,986 but if you need help, I can bring you. 390 00:20:38,695 --> 00:20:42,615 I can have a friend handle it, somebody I trust. 391 00:20:42,657 --> 00:20:44,826 What makes you think I want an abortion? 392 00:20:46,035 --> 00:20:48,496 - Are you serious? - Mmm-hmm. 393 00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:51,708 Thanks for your help. I'll just use my expired antibiotics. 394 00:21:10,226 --> 00:21:12,562 How dare Hermie accuse me of wasting my potential? 395 00:21:13,354 --> 00:21:16,524 Huh? The audacity. What has he done with his life? 396 00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:19,194 He's got 20 years of wasted potential on me. Twenty-five! 397 00:21:19,861 --> 00:21:21,738 Okay, well, maybe that's why he's being so hard on you, 398 00:21:21,821 --> 00:21:23,865 because, you know, he doesn't want you to end up like him. 399 00:21:23,948 --> 00:21:26,785 Yeah, because I won't end up like him, ever. 400 00:21:26,868 --> 00:21:27,911 Okay. 401 00:21:27,994 --> 00:21:29,412 - Okay! - Okay. 402 00:21:30,705 --> 00:21:32,874 Fuck, I'm gonna totally end up like him. 403 00:21:33,166 --> 00:21:35,835 - Well, I mean... - And even if I did end up like him, 404 00:21:35,877 --> 00:21:37,670 is that so wrong, is that so bad? 405 00:21:37,712 --> 00:21:40,131 He's got a wife, he's got a business, 406 00:21:40,215 --> 00:21:42,634 he's got the wisdom of 1,000 fortune cookies. 407 00:21:42,717 --> 00:21:47,222 I mean, I don't know. Maybe that's... Maybe I'd be totally fine if I ended up like him. 408 00:21:48,389 --> 00:21:50,725 Well, maybe he wants you to have a life that's better than fine. 409 00:21:52,143 --> 00:21:55,688 Yeah. Fuck, you're right. 410 00:21:55,730 --> 00:21:59,359 That's exactly what he wants. He wants me to be a better version of himself. 411 00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:02,195 - I'm gonna go apologize to him right now. - Okay, good. 412 00:22:02,237 --> 00:22:05,031 And you know what? Yeah, maybe it is time I make some changes. 413 00:22:05,073 --> 00:22:07,909 - Maybe it is time I do something fucking real. - Mmm-hmm. 414 00:22:07,951 --> 00:22:11,371 You know, something people will remember. 415 00:22:11,412 --> 00:22:14,541 - You know? - Oh, wait, like kill yourself? 416 00:22:14,749 --> 00:22:16,334 What? 417 00:22:16,584 --> 00:22:19,712 I'm sorry, it just really sounded like you were gearing up to that. 418 00:22:20,255 --> 00:22:21,464 I'm not gonna kill myself, Shosh. 419 00:22:21,548 --> 00:22:23,091 - Okay, good. - Good. 420 00:22:23,132 --> 00:22:25,301 - Do you wanna kill yourself? - No, don't. No. 421 00:22:26,845 --> 00:22:28,596 - We'll talk about this later. - Great. 422 00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:29,931 Or not. 423 00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,767 That got real, fast. 424 00:22:40,608 --> 00:22:42,485 - Hi. - Hey. 425 00:22:42,569 --> 00:22:45,280 We're here to discuss a creative project with you. 426 00:22:45,363 --> 00:22:47,198 Well, it's a... It's a film. 427 00:22:47,282 --> 00:22:49,033 - Yeah. - It's a film about the complex dynamic 428 00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:51,160 that the three of us have been fostering for years now 429 00:22:51,244 --> 00:22:52,245 - if you really think about it. - Mmm-hmm. 430 00:22:52,287 --> 00:22:54,163 And I know it's really, really painful, 431 00:22:54,247 --> 00:22:55,582 so you don't have to make the decision now 432 00:22:55,623 --> 00:22:56,958 whether you wanna sign a release, or not. 433 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,793 - No, no. No, we're so not there yet. - It's not, we're way... 434 00:22:58,877 --> 00:23:00,670 - We're... No. - ...far down. 435 00:23:00,753 --> 00:23:03,673 No, we just want you to think about how rich this is, cinematically. 436 00:23:03,756 --> 00:23:06,759 You know? And to think about the story that we could tell. 437 00:23:07,135 --> 00:23:09,596 And we just would really hope 438 00:23:09,637 --> 00:23:14,058 that you will grant us permission to share what has transpired with the world 439 00:23:14,142 --> 00:23:16,311 and sort of elegantly unfold this... 440 00:23:16,352 --> 00:23:17,812 This little package, really. 441 00:23:17,896 --> 00:23:19,272 I mean... Meh. 442 00:23:20,315 --> 00:23:22,692 You guys should do whatever you want. 443 00:23:42,211 --> 00:23:44,631 - Hey. - Hey, what about the party? 444 00:23:44,672 --> 00:23:46,507 It was total bullshit. 445 00:23:46,591 --> 00:23:50,595 It was just, like, a bunch of old gays being like, "Oh, I'm so busy during the week. 446 00:23:50,678 --> 00:23:52,764 "I can only do uppers on the weekends." 447 00:23:52,847 --> 00:23:54,682 Oh, well, good for you, Anthony. 448 00:23:57,393 --> 00:23:58,853 - Did you go to the ER? - Uh-huh. 449 00:23:58,937 --> 00:24:01,481 Yeah? You get some drugs, little Eponine? 450 00:24:01,522 --> 00:24:04,025 Yeah, I'm okay. 451 00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:06,611 - Did they give you something for the pain? - Mmm-mmm. 452 00:24:07,904 --> 00:24:10,949 Those unfeeling bastards. 453 00:24:11,032 --> 00:24:14,577 Come, come. Put your little head on my lap. 454 00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:19,666 Come, come. There you go. 455 00:24:19,707 --> 00:24:21,125 Come here, little girl. 456 00:24:25,004 --> 00:24:27,799 I'm sorry I'm using my pizza hand. 457 00:24:27,882 --> 00:24:30,593 Just adding more grease to this situation. 458 00:25:08,256 --> 00:25:11,634 Hermie? You there? 459 00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:16,723 I'm opening up, you deaf bastard. 460 00:25:18,474 --> 00:25:19,726 Coming in. 461 00:25:27,942 --> 00:25:29,152 Hermie? 462 00:25:33,114 --> 00:25:34,115 Hermie? 463 00:25:35,116 --> 00:25:36,325 Hermie? 464 00:25:38,995 --> 00:25:40,121 Hermie? 465 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:46,210 Hey. Hermie? 466 00:25:46,294 --> 00:25:49,005 Hey, wake up. I gotta talk to you. 467 00:25:49,088 --> 00:25:53,009 Hey. Hermie. Hey. 468 00:25:54,969 --> 00:25:56,220 Hermie. 469 00:25:56,804 --> 00:25:59,599 Hey, Hermie. Hey! 470 00:26:00,224 --> 00:26:04,187 Wake up, you motherfucker! Wake up! Hey! 471 00:26:04,270 --> 00:26:05,688 Hermie! 472 00:26:09,317 --> 00:26:11,360 Hey! Hermie!